I don't even know why I am blogging, I guess to help put a stop to this madness in my head since I don't journal often (which I know being a good mormon I should), but I don't. So cyberspace you get a little glimpse of my inner-being today.
I guess I am not upset or mad, I am not struggling with life, I am more just boggled. When I was 16 years old I had planned out the rest of my life. Go to the U, become a Chi Omega, marry some hot guy before I graduate. After that have three children, live in a nice house, travel my butt off and enjoy the life I wanted.
So here I am... finishing up my second to last semester of my entire college career. No husband, no sorority and a completely different outlook on life. The thing is, right now I don't need a husband and I am fine not having the security blanket of a sorority.
I used to fear change, a lot. I think I am starting to embrace and maybe even crave change. Not knowing where I will be a year from now gives me a little joy.
Today has been a day of reflection and contemplation. Some say college is for finding oneself. I disagree, I don't think there is ever a point where you "find"yourself, just points in your life when you discover parts of yourself.
I guess I am realizing that (as cliche as this sounds) things really do happen for a reason. People come in and out of my life, and even though they don't know it, they are helping me find "Beth Welch". I learn things from friends, family and strangers that have helped me so much.
So far I have discovered I am an excited, determined girl. Who at times is hopeful and naive, which at times can lead to disappointment, but mostly I love who I am, and where I am and I am excited to see what happens tomorrow!